Every morning I do my chores as normal person. I am holding a senior manager position, my wife is a teacher, my 2 children are doing well in the secondary school. Our family is blessed with my parents who actively and voluntarily takes care of our home while we are away to work. I have few friends and we meet often. Despite of all these, deep inside me, I am feeling lonely. I have tried many measures, to eradicate the feelings,
I don’t know why it is crippling in my mind. Out of sudden, in the midst of talking and chatting, I can feel very lonely. I wake up feeling lonely. I seems to have no mood to go for family functions or outings. Even I go for vacation, I am quite and will just follow the flow with reduced energy. Obviously, I am dragging my feet to follow, for the sake of family members. I am living with high procrastination. I even at a times, get drunk, but still the same. Cough syrup helps to make me rest. I was never like this before. I know I am lonely.
My mind seems to be in the state of numb. I pretend daily to be normal and active. Alas, it is stressful. I love sleeping, It seems, the meaning of life is deteriorating. The energy which I used to have is no more. At the work place, I am very much of an observer than a worker. Yes man to everything. What is happening to me? I don’t want to be lonely. Give me back my junior self, 15 years back when I started work.